It seems like forever since I've been able to post anything to update you ... and we actually still have nothing regarding the adoption to tell you about. Just sittin' ... and waitin' ... and hopin' ...
Some days I think it is hard to believe that it is June already. It still seems like such a short time ago that we filled out the application forms and had our first meeting with the social worker. It's nice that the whole paper work process is over, but we're in a very lonely stage right now. We don't really have any reminders that our child is coming one day. I previously posted my mind's tangled thoughts about the fact that we don't have the daily reminders that pregnant parents-to-be have. You know, the ultra sounds, cravings, doctor's appointments, and the big round belly kicking and pushing on your bladder! We did have paper work, reading, paper work, invasive appointments, reading ... and I'm starting to get to the point where I almost want that all again. I want the daily reminders back. Time went by quicker when we were working towards something. Time is standing still when you keep thinking how far away something has yet to come and you can't do anything to make it go faster.
I remember during one of my pregnancies being so sick and weak, thinking I would never get pregnant again [but I did!]. Now, I sometimes wish I could go back to that. I know I am expecting a child, but when? The only answer is one day in the future. No one knows when except God. I don't have a due date. It's testing my faith. Not my faith in God ... just my faith. But it's like having faith in God. It's believing in something even though you can't see it and don't know all the answers. We know it's there - somewhere. At what stage? Who knows. Maybe it's born, maybe it's not.
Two very big things continue to burn inside me. One of course is our adoption. Our dream for a family. Our dream to adopt. It is not a second choice or plan B to having a family. It is simply a choice. It is a calling. It is a burning desire. The other is my personal dream of helping children in Africa. Lyle and my mom have been two of the very few people to really see the passion I've had. I can't help but be continually drawn to this. Always have been. I've made a mistake though. I always thought I had to go there to do something; to contribute. But that's an expensive trip and would only be short term so I've continually left it as a dream. I kept putting it aside saying one day. But I'm slowly starting to do something now. I'm volunteering with CHOIR and with Canadian Food for the Hungry. It's not because I'm adopting that I'm helping and it's not because I'm helping that I'm adoptiong. It can be considered coincidental, but it's more than likely God's ever-so-perfect timing that I'm starting them at the same time. Each opening more doors for the other. Each giving life experiences to help understand each topic more indepth.
Here is a music video that both Lyle and I would like to pass on. It speaks so loudly about a cause that is so important. Ladies, you may need a tissue:
World On Fire.
We again thank people for the continued contributions that have been coming in for Ethiopia. Your gifts, whether large or small, are all valued immensly as every penny is so helpful. We have been able to purchase some much needed items already to take with us. Sears was recently great in reducing some already reduced to clear lined rain coats [VERY CUTE!!] even further. As well, thank you to the people who have made some contributions to our adoption. It is a blessing as we continue to trust God in his provisions.
Some days I think it is hard to believe that it is June already. It still seems like such a short time ago that we filled out the application forms and had our first meeting with the social worker. It's nice that the whole paper work process is over, but we're in a very lonely stage right now. We don't really have any reminders that our child is coming one day. I previously posted my mind's tangled thoughts about the fact that we don't have the daily reminders that pregnant parents-to-be have. You know, the ultra sounds, cravings, doctor's appointments, and the big round belly kicking and pushing on your bladder! We did have paper work, reading, paper work, invasive appointments, reading ... and I'm starting to get to the point where I almost want that all again. I want the daily reminders back. Time went by quicker when we were working towards something. Time is standing still when you keep thinking how far away something has yet to come and you can't do anything to make it go faster.
I remember during one of my pregnancies being so sick and weak, thinking I would never get pregnant again [but I did!]. Now, I sometimes wish I could go back to that. I know I am expecting a child, but when? The only answer is one day in the future. No one knows when except God. I don't have a due date. It's testing my faith. Not my faith in God ... just my faith. But it's like having faith in God. It's believing in something even though you can't see it and don't know all the answers. We know it's there - somewhere. At what stage? Who knows. Maybe it's born, maybe it's not.
Two very big things continue to burn inside me. One of course is our adoption. Our dream for a family. Our dream to adopt. It is not a second choice or plan B to having a family. It is simply a choice. It is a calling. It is a burning desire. The other is my personal dream of helping children in Africa. Lyle and my mom have been two of the very few people to really see the passion I've had. I can't help but be continually drawn to this. Always have been. I've made a mistake though. I always thought I had to go there to do something; to contribute. But that's an expensive trip and would only be short term so I've continually left it as a dream. I kept putting it aside saying one day. But I'm slowly starting to do something now. I'm volunteering with CHOIR and with Canadian Food for the Hungry. It's not because I'm adopting that I'm helping and it's not because I'm helping that I'm adoptiong. It can be considered coincidental, but it's more than likely God's ever-so-perfect timing that I'm starting them at the same time. Each opening more doors for the other. Each giving life experiences to help understand each topic more indepth.
Here is a music video that both Lyle and I would like to pass on. It speaks so loudly about a cause that is so important. Ladies, you may need a tissue:
World On Fire.
We again thank people for the continued contributions that have been coming in for Ethiopia. Your gifts, whether large or small, are all valued immensly as every penny is so helpful. We have been able to purchase some much needed items already to take with us. Sears was recently great in reducing some already reduced to clear lined rain coats [VERY CUTE!!] even further. As well, thank you to the people who have made some contributions to our adoption. It is a blessing as we continue to trust God in his provisions.
3 comments:
WOW the video really makes you think!! Makes me want to go there and help. I have felt really blessed not only by your friendship but by your love for God and others. I thank the Lord for you and pray that He gives you all the desires of your heart.
Renee
Hi Sheri
Lesley (from CAFAC board) here and I wanted to say hi and I love reading your blog.
Also to say, although this is a lonely stage and a hard one, we are here! If you need to email to vent about the long waits...go ahead! Believe me...I can relate!
We also have such a passion for Africa..we HAVE to meet up!
Anyay..have a good day and "chat" with you soon I hope!
Lesley
Hi Sheri!
I loved this entry! I too wish I had the constant little reminders of pregnancy. I also wish I had the round belly to tell the world about our family members on the way! keep in touch and keep smiling!
Post a Comment